"Look, Very Soon I Can Actually Start Writing About Hockey Games, Hang In There" Report for 9/4/2007

As the weeks dwindle by, and the days all meld into one sort of “super-day” in which I am perpetually going to work, I lament the last remaining days of summer with a glimmer in my eye like an old man recounting the days of his youth. Yet, on the horizon, just out of reach, is my “Rushmore” – Hockey season. With training camp mere weeks away, I have already begun the traditional “hockey season is back” hugs that generally last a little bit too long, and usually fill up the office complaint box within minutes. Although my questionable sexual orientation may be the inexplicable leitmotiv of this blog, I digress. The real reason for my salubrious attitude in the face of waning summer time activities is the start of the 2007 Tampa Bay Lightning season. And while winter-time brings with it a cold-gray reality, and an alabaster visage, we have the one thing that a new season brings that could never be swallowed up by the unfortunate vicissitudes of life: hope. Hope of a new season and a fresh start.

With that said, hope is not naïve. I don’t need a perfect season this year. 81-1 is cool. But I would like to see the second round of the playoffs this year, and maybe even a new division banner? Last year, Lecavalier turned my enjoyment of hockey from something that's borderline unhealthy to something that's completely unhealthy. While I really can’t expect him to lead the league in goals every year, I do expect him to at the very least break 50 again this year.

Will Doug MacLean continue to be the Machiavellian douche that got him run out of Columbus and Miami? Will they spend the money to get players at the trade deadline if and when we do require that? Will I fix my typos in this article before I post it? Unlikely.

Well, of one thing you can be sure, this blog, fueled mostly by caffeinated drinks and Centrum multi-vitamins, will be broadcast simultaneously to all three people I know on the internet and in 49 states (sorry Tennessee!) So I will stay on top of the ansgty melodrama that is sure to follow this team this season, and offer my unbiased (READ: I haven’t been bought, YET *Hint hint*) opinion and entertain those of you who meant to click on the link above mine. So read on, those of you with poor mouse skills, and keep checking this blog. I guarantee that you will die from the literary genius contained within*



*results not guaranteed.